inner strength

When the bell tolls for you and none seems to be willing to grab the halter on your behalf, when the sweet words turn into abusive insults and words meant to pull you down, when the caresses turn to slaps and the pats become fists, an important time would have come.

Pain cannot be budgeted for; pain cannot be bargained for otherwise all of us would use the ‘GET OUT OF JAIL CARD’ to avoid the emotional cost. If it was that simple, all of us would take the detour to avoid even an inchling of pain. The worst part of it is that pain sources are the closest of our allies. Pain comes from those that know us best and those who know what words would hurt us most. Those close people who know what our weaknesses are and know what will send us tumbling to the ground.

Pain sources should not be the tombstones of our happiness. Whoever gives you pain should not push you to the end: they should be a source of going better and stronger. Yes, painful words from close allies do hurt most but your focus should be beyond the pain. Besides growing a thick skin one should strive to rise above the pain and walk forward with life’s plan.

Deadening pain is not killing the pain. Applying an emotional cosmetic facade does not take away the reality of pain. At times we try to convince ourselves that the people who hurt us never meant to, we try to believe a gospel that we would never dare preach to anyone. It is better to accept that you tripped and hurt your toe than to try to convince yourself that the stone that you tripped on never intended to cause your toe pain.

The next time the pain clouds gather, when the ally words stab deeper, when the spouse’s words gut you, turn into your heart, deep down the person you are is a reserve. A reserve meant to tide you out of such times. A reserve meant to remind you that you are better than the pain and its source.  That reserve is able to make you stop for a moment; take a deep breath and re- discover yourself. The reserve is called INNER STRENGTH.

As the sun rises tomorrow let no pain be your death, visionaries have seen light beyond pain, leaders have seen Canaan beyond insults, and generals have seen victories beyond the bloodletting. Tomorrow would be more relevant if you knew that there is life beyond the pain and those that give you the pain.


achilles heel

The legend of Achilles has it that he was dipped into the river Styx by his mother Thetis in order to make him invulnerable. His heel wasn’t covered by the water and he was later killed by an arrow wound to his heel.

Although the legend is ancient, the phrase wasn’t picked up in English until the 19th century. It is used as a metaphor for vulnerability. (Source

Most, if not all the times that I have found myself at fault, I have always managed to trace my issues to a weak link. A link that would have easily been dealt with by being thrust into the furnace and strengthened by fire. A link that could have been re-forged and re-linked to come out stronger and better.

Our weaknesses are our worst undoing. Like the love of chocolate that gives birth to extra layers of fat after the ecstasy of the sweetness is long gone, like the madness of throwing caution into the wind that breeds pain many years after the throes of indulgence, so are our weaknesses.

Our weaknesses feed on our egos. The more we allow them to portend over us the more they enslave us. Do you see a man who boasts about his weaknesses? That man is not wise. I have had people claim they have no control over their sexual impulses and they speak of sexual scalps like they were trophies. I have never seen a person who openly flaunts open, festering wounds and a man who boasts of being controlled by his weakness is like a person who displays a festering wound which if unattended, will eventually result in amputation.

Our weaknesses show our being mortal. They are an indication of our being human but our weaknesses must not be our downfall. Every man (woman) has a weak link. Every one of us has a frailty but how we end up depends on we deal with it. One who indulges their weakness indulges destruction. One who faces up to their frailty and works towards strength works for the good.

The key is in knowledge. One who knows their weaknesses will stay away from the fountains that spew that source of derailing. One who knows that they throw fists at the slightest provocation will do good to stay away from the gatherings of those that are liberally mouthed. Knowing your weakness is a conquering point. Admitting frailty is an aspect of humanity. Dealing with your weaknesses and avoiding the swamp that causes you to slip is a noble thing.

So, how goes your life? What is your Achilles heel and will it still enslave you tomorrow when the sun rises?

Achilles my foot !!


Our words are those syllables that we combine to produce a sound meant to establish a link between us and others (or are they?). Our words are our own product though at times we find ourselves needing to disown the impulse that would have brought them about, but fact remains that they still are our words and we own them by virtue of having uttered them.

Our words are us. What we say is a reflection of our perception about the subject at hand. They reflect our depth on the understanding of the matter at hand, they reflect our disposition to the matter at hand and how we would execute it if we were ever given a chance to play God.

Our words are our measure. From our words it can be told of how intolerant, impish, subordinate or virtuous we are. The utterances and the pitch at which they are cast reflect how low we can sink to climb high enough to be seen or heard.

Our words own us. Many a times I have seen a solemn face try to disown a statement spoken in haste. The words would have been spoken and gone but the attribute would still be obtaining. The words that we produce with our own mouths enslave us. They bind us to honor the pledges and oaths and at the same time they call us to remission and penance upon discovery of omissions.

Since our words are a large reflection of us, it therefore follows that they must be carefully executed. No successful event is without preparation, and haste breeds disaster. The same applies with words. Those spoken out of turn will bring pain in turn. Those spoken in haste will bring a   bitter taste.

Words must not be impulsive. Impulsive words are equivalent to a knee jerk. A knee jerk is a sudden disjoint that takes one off balance and can cause a tilt in gravity and if worse can cause a fracture. Knee jerk words also disorient, distract and break hearts. Those of the art of love speak of foreplay as a sure way to heavenly orgasms and bliss. They cannot be far from the truth as all those words they use to describe what should transpires are a simple instruction teaching souls to ponder, mould , shape , usher our words unto action.(no pun intended !).

Words must not be diarrheal. I am more prone to forgive the soul that would fart in an enclosed room and suffocate us with the product of the boiled eggs they ate two days ago than suffer the peril of a mouth that runs and lets off words un abated. Like the proverbial diarrhea, all such a mouth can do is leave behind a soiled emotional fabric and an unusable emotional stench.

So, how are your words? As surely as the sun will rise tomorrow will your words cause reason to rise in many?