When the bell tolls for you and none seems to be willing to grab the halter on your behalf, when the sweet words turn into abusive insults and words meant to pull you down, when the caresses turn to slaps and the pats become fists, an important time would have come.
Pain cannot be budgeted for; pain cannot be bargained for otherwise all of us would use the ‘GET OUT OF JAIL CARD’ to avoid the emotional cost. If it was that simple, all of us would take the detour to avoid even an inchling of pain. The worst part of it is that pain sources are the closest of our allies. Pain comes from those that know us best and those who know what words would hurt us most. Those close people who know what our weaknesses are and know what will send us tumbling to the ground.
Pain sources should not be the tombstones of our happiness. Whoever gives you pain should not push you to the end: they should be a source of going better and stronger. Yes, painful words from close allies do hurt most but your focus should be beyond the pain. Besides growing a thick skin one should strive to rise above the pain and walk forward with life’s plan.
Deadening pain is not killing the pain. Applying an emotional cosmetic facade does not take away the reality of pain. At times we try to convince ourselves that the people who hurt us never meant to, we try to believe a gospel that we would never dare preach to anyone. It is better to accept that you tripped and hurt your toe than to try to convince yourself that the stone that you tripped on never intended to cause your toe pain.
The next time the pain clouds gather, when the ally words stab deeper, when the spouse’s words gut you, turn into your heart, deep down the person you are is a reserve. A reserve meant to tide you out of such times. A reserve meant to remind you that you are better than the pain and its source. That reserve is able to make you stop for a moment; take a deep breath and re- discover yourself. The reserve is called INNER STRENGTH.
As the sun rises tomorrow let no pain be your death, visionaries have seen light beyond pain, leaders have seen Canaan beyond insults, and generals have seen victories beyond the bloodletting. Tomorrow would be more relevant if you knew that there is life beyond the pain and those that give you the pain.